(shared by the excellent Drude)
For one thing, it’s just funny. Next thing? It’s FUNNY!
Then, we get into:
This whole end of the world thing is getting close, isn’t it? I’d practically forgotten and would have done if not for the fact I chose 21.12.12 as my goal date for hitting 22% body fat.
Enough levity, let’s get real:
While it could be done, I’m focusing on basics or returning to basics.
The last 2 months, my eating was filled with loads of nutrient defunct food. Some people do horse, some people illegally take RX meds, me? I go off the rails with non-hunger directed eating (emotional eating).
I was coming down out of freak-out mode over mum then, I was delivered the carotid artery ‘obstruction’ & weird EKG for myself. Immediately, I went for ice cream. That’s not true, immediately, I returned to work. After work, I had ice cream for supper.
I re-listened to Josie Spinardi’s wonderful audiobook on a return to sane, hunger directed eating.
It’s Gasping for Food and Chasing the Taste with Licking my Wounds (Josie Spinardi terms). Gasping (grabbing things I know are bad for that condition and normally don’t eat but when shown the possibility that they will be completely off limits not by my choice?), Chasing (nom, wait…NOM! Wait, wait…NOMNOMNOM) and Licking (powerlessness: if anybody knows all the stuff I’ve done my whole life to not be like my family in emotional-behavioural, physical and medical ways, then you understand hearing ‘You lose’ was a blow: I’ve done everything right (for the most part).
This is Life. Life is a funny thing. I’m still Lily and Lily rocks.
I’m resurfacing. The 22% body fat goal now seems shallow. I still want it. Heck, I still want 20% but mostly, I want to keep working, where I have medical insurance and make money for copays. I want to get everything checked that needs to be and anything done that needs to be. My spine issues are okay now focus on this heart disease thing.