Dr. So and So*

* Wish that I could share the song with you but Spotify (which I hate anyway just for these reasons–they NEVER have what I want because I’m not your normal listener) nor youtube have it. You can listen to a clip at Amazon…

My GP retired. I needed to find a replacement. Last December, I rang around MANY places and found none taking new patients. Now, I’m not saying ‘nobody’ is but after making 12 phone calls, I got ONE place that said they had a doctor in their group who was receiving new ones, so I snapped that up.

Three months was the wait. Yesterday, was the appointment.

Now, I need to find another doctor. I cannot go back there.

Here’s the thing: as a GP (internal medicine is the modern appellation), I don’t expect you to know everything. I hope that you’re sort of current on big issues but if you don’t know something, there’s nothing like genuine caring and concern, an interest in getting a handle on a medical topic and an openness to learn. Walk with me towards better health, yo.

This doctor was relatively young. I like that! That means they’ve probably gotten some current info and they’re still hoping to save people! Well, that’s what I presume when I see a young doctor. Not to say older doctors are out of the loop or jaded but I have this idea about younger ones. Plus, if it all works out, I won’t have to worry about them retiring on me again. -where was I?

Right. This doctor’s office is about 60 miles from where I live because I don’t live near anything but I could find somebody closer. I went with this one because it was the first-nearest who’d take anybody new. I’m reiterating this because boy, is it going to be a PIMA to find somebody else.

I go in and wait, then get a full interview with the first lady. Then, another wait and the doctor’s assistant comes in and gives a full interview. After another wait, the doctor shows. She didn’t make eye contact and sort of mumbled at me. I had to ask her to repeat herself. She was irritated by that. ‘Get up on the table.’ Oh, okay. I can do that but we’re to have an interview first. I think seated would be more normal but She must have Her way, so I clamber on the freak table.

During the interview, she’s reading the assistant’s notes and googling — I swear to God. She’d google something then say something like, ‘WHY ARE YOU TAKING POTASSIUM?!’

I know this is a red flag to doctors who haven’t seen my records. Pity she didn’t bother, so I said, ‘Blood tests showed I was low.’ That pissed her off. Then she asked how often I take my gut tranqs – which had been reported ‘as needed.’

‘For the last two weeks, daily, but before then only now and then since I got the Celiac diagnosis and got completely off things that would injure my gut.’

That pissed her off. ‘You have a counter-indication here.’ It wasn’t what she said but how she said it? Heck, it alarmed me. ‘Really? What?’

She said the potassium and tranq. I asked, ‘Oh, gosh. What would be an indication? Since I don’t have to take it often, I’ll have to watch out for anything.’

She glared at me. After a few seconds, I reworded my concern and that I’d like to know what would be a sign that I’m harming myself, like nausea, fainting, stroke, seizure…you know? What signs?

She started googling. I wish that I were joking.

Look, I don’t believe she has to know everything but if you’re going to bother being LOUD AND ANGRY because something I’m taking counter-indicates, why didn’t you bother SEEING what it could possibly do? I would do that and I bet anybody reading this or WebMD would say, ‘OMG, counter indication?!?! What would it BE?’

Dr. So and So? Nothing. And angry that I asked. I don’t know wtf I’m supposed to do if I need both…I assume get a different prescription that would NOT counter?

Another one she stone-cold flipped on was me taking 10,000 D3 a day. This is not an insane amount but she railed. RAILED. Finally, I said, ‘Celiac? Celiacs commonly are low and need supplementation. While I was only diagnosed less than 3 years ago, I’ve had this since childhood which explains why I’ve always had malabsorption issues and always been prescribed supplements.’ -like in my MOTHERFUCKINGMEDICALHISTORY

 

‘Celiac is such a new thing…’

 

Okay. You can be not-so-up-to-date but that’s flat-out, fecking, unreasonably ill-informed. Her response as an ill-informed yet professional would’ve been something like: We spent about 3 minutes on that in school. I’m not up on the literature. How do you handle it?

It should’ve been in the nature of trying to get a handle on how she should approach this as my doctor.

It was obvious that she didn’t know a great deal (I’m only sharing about Celiac but there’s other autoimmune and heart disease is RAMPANT in my family. She should’ve been very concerned about the heart issues. She was not.

In case you have autoimmune diseases, especially Crohns or Ulcerative Colitis and/ or Celiac, or know somebody who does and would like to be exponentially better informed than this doctor I won’t return to, listening to this video lecture is going to set you up as a winner.