gulag, ‘Eddie Haskell’

I was in the Occidee Aquariums today doing part of my job. They tend to congregate in one–or one person in the other. Meaning, you get allowed into one, where it’s practically a party, then you have to get one to let you into the other or go let whoever is being unsociable–hiding out in the other.

Today it was Unsociable (not always the same occifer).

He let me in to do my stuff and said, ‘Hey, let me out. I have to do a wing walk.’

I was like…erm? Should I be In Control of Control?

He said not to worry, just lock up when I was done and return the keys to the other Occifer Aquarium.

This is a lot of backstory to say that I was alone in Control where I am safe but like…technically shouldn’t be there as non-guard material.

There’s a chuck hole on each wall that peers out into a wing.

It’s very hard to hear but clients are always trying to pry it open to speak to Occifers. Occifers (even when clients are trying to be heard, will lean their heads down into it (truly safe, you basically get the equivalent of listening through a wall with a glass up to your ear).

That was even more backstory to say that I was alone and couldn’t hear shite–even when a client held open his side of the chuck hole to tell me about my fine body–

I could partially hear. Only enough to know it was about my body. Without looking at him or the chuck hole, I said LOUDLY:

‘Uhn uhn. You know you don’t make personal comments.’

Loud and clear back, I hear:

Sorry, Miss Reed. I appreciate all the work you do for us everyday.

Turd.

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