Tomorrow is The Duchess’ yahrzeit.
In contrast with her ‘parenting,’ here is a photo of my friend’s ‘very’ Italian parents, who have spent the last 2 weeks WITH HER in hospital (after gut surgery).

I had a frail infancy and childhood. My parents never spent the night.

These lovely people are in their 80s and still give to their children, unconditional love.

Additionally, the father had a massive stroke some years ago and is paralyzed on one side. He’s STILL representing.



7 thoughts on “Mums

  1. wow. i spent 4 days in hospital with diverticulitis and even with the 2 or 3 “friend” visits it was still the loneliest time of my life. I finally started refusing meds so the doc sent me home, to my kitties, under the agreement that I would take my pills there (and I did).

    key thing I learned: do NOT send flowers to hospital patients. send balloons or activities. flowers smelled repulsive to me and were a bitch to transport home! best of all: call/visit and ask what they’d like. I was most grateful for he neighbors who brought me clean undies!!


    • I have sent plants with a card suggesting they could be donated to nurses/ other patients if they didn’t want to transport them. I like the idea of a living thing there in the room.

      Liked by 1 person

      • plants are great. it was just flowers that were overwhelming… apparently some of the meds I was on made my sense of smell extra sensitive… I loved looking at them but the smell was difficult to bear.


  2. As a nine-month-old baby, I went into the hospital with horrible dysentery and nearly died. My parents didn’t stay, either. My mom says “people just didn’t do that back then.” It’s lovely to see those Italian parents staying for their daughter.


    • It’s definitely untrue that parents didn’t stay. I grew up with people from my area horrified that they didn’t (well, the mother). Another time when I had surgery, my godmother came because it bothered her so much I was always abandoned.

      It may be in different situations or perhaps people worked so they visited but didn’t stay-stay. I didn’t even get visits!


  3. True story: I once told a younger co-worker I was going out of town over the weekend because of a yahrzeit and somehow he got the idea it was a kind of automobile.


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