My musical skills are so great YT blocked my uke playing & singing for copyright infringement while I’m playing for my dead mum

ARE YOU SHITTING ME?

Bonus: it was put on youtube so that I could share the hilarious sidebars from The Duchess. You know, my DEAD MOTHER?

Fucking idiots. I hope they all burn to death.

yt blocked me for copyright infringement

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Unscientific Science-y Tuesday: SOLVED makeup brush stink stank stunk (stench)

This is a REAL issue, which sounds super dumb. Over the decades, I’ve bought high-end and low-end makeup brushes but lately, say over the last 10 years, I’ve had an overwhelming problem with STENCH.

The fumes are so offensive, that I can’t keep brushes in the same room with me if I’m going to be there for say, an hour. I don’t mean, “Ooo, this is smelly.” I mean, my eyes water, my nose runs and I get a headache. Yes, you can blame this on my being a little puss but google “makeup brush smell” and you’ll see I’m not the only one.

Since virtually everything is made by that betch Chi’na, I blame it on Herself. Some glue they’re using or some step they’re skipping that used to be a matter of practice back in the good old days when your majority of makeup and brushes was made in the Fatherland: Germany. Sure, France and Italy, too, but Germany commanded the makeup industry. What can I say? I guess they learnt how to destink after all those death camps.

-are the new readers gone yet?

If working as a civil servant has done anything for me, it hasn’t cleaned up my attitude. What’s funny is we not only have to take DAYS of classes and pass tests in sensitivity. Yes, I cheat.

Right!

I have attempted using Old Tyme Hillbilly (TM) methods for destenching but these have failed me, which was a shock. Usually, if anybody knew how to do anything, it was the poorest and the most remote (away from civilisation) folk. Whail’p, not this time.

What DID work was taking sort of all of those things (not all) and adding ONE IMPORTANT THING: modern technology. Okay, I’m aging myself. Modern technology is nanobots (are those real yet or still only in Star Trek?) and what I mean is something from the 20th century. -to somebody raised as if it were the mid-1800s, that is still modern technology

Laundry odour defense.

Now, don’t get all excited and only use that. You must need to use all ingredients for the effect I’m promising.

Here we go. Now, if you purchased one brush, you’ll need less solution. If you do as I did and grab all of the extant stinky brushes for a free-for-all, throw-down, come-to-Jeebus, then you’ll need more. Bonus tip: if you make too much, you can store it for later use but honestly? If I had too much (which I do), I’d add it to my next laundry wash.

Considering the Science of what the ingredients are:

  • vinaigre (vinegar) is an acid
  • baking soda is alkaline
  • water is our base and dilution
  • conditioner is an oil
  • odour defense is…

a. fragrance but more importantly

downy unstopables.jpgb. masking “fragrance”

c. meant to be used on clothing, including synthetics

Now! Right quick, I want to admit that my bundle of brushes tested are mostly real hair (PETA, come get me, like I care, I grew up chopping up animals that I had named on a working ranch). Also, I applaud vegans and have many vegans friends who still love me. In this case, I’d purchased some closeout brushes on the cheap and they happened to be hair.

Vinaigre and baking soda are long-known as stink-stoppers. Baking soda is used (if you aren’t familiar) in refrigerators to absorb nastiness. Vinaigre can be placed in saucers and set around for a day or so to absorb (or cut, I don’t understand the magic but I’m pretty sure it has to do with the fumes) ‘staleness.’ The conditioner is used to help a) coat / stick and b) keep the solution from destroying brush hairs. Mostly, it’s to help coat but this really will help make the brush hairs (synthetic or real) softer. And finally, if you don’t know what masking fragrance is, you can google it but it’s basically the ‘neutraliser’ in febreeze (then, they add more scent) and many laundry detergents or FOR BONUS: check your ‘unscented’ deodorant (for your pits). Usually, any item that says ‘unscented’ is really DE-SCENTED with masking fragrance. Point is, it well, de-scents. Then, many laundry items with it will actually have another fragrance added. Therefore, it taketh away the body odour and putteth back some ‘smelly-good.’

This is what we are doing but we are ALSO trying to remove the offensive nastiness, too.

I used:

  • 1C hot water (my SMALL wattage microwave for 2 mins in pyrex measuring cup, pictured)
  • 2T aundry wash additive pellets (in this case, Downy Fresh Protect I use other brands and I think they’re all made by the same elves)
  • 1 heaping T baking soda
  • 1/4C vinaigre (now, listen, I don’t actually measure but I did a splash and it didn’t fizz, vinaigre and baking soda FIZZ, so I added more until it fizzed)
  • 1/8t hair conditioner

Hints: the hair conditioner I feel, is important for reasons already stated but you don’t want much. The vinaigre and baking soda fizz means you need to use a measuring cup large / deep enough to accommodate the fizz-up (it will fall). The laundry additive, while the missing component from previous experiments might affect you adversely, should you be a puss. I’m typically not a puss and I have this on-hand as I use it in my laundry. I will say that while I use about the same amount in a wash load (little) in this solution (relatively, a lot). Chacun à son goût.

Put them in together, stir until it’s all mixed.

Next, whatever amount you’ll be de-stenching, the brush/es need to be relatively upright/ vertical. This is so the solution doesn’t go up into the ferule. I may have spelt that correctly. It’s the metal bit that holds the hair part to the handle part. You’re welcome.

Also of note is the fact that even if some goes up, don’t freak out. It’s not going to sit / soak for long and will probably be alright, particularly since this is about getting that nasty smell off, not a weekly deep clean (or if you’re me, daily deep clean). I used wine glasses to clean approximately 20 brushes. I put the 4 largest ones in one and the balance in the other. Should I have needed more or less glasses, I would have done. The four large brushes stood almost perfectly upright and the small ones did, too.

Once the dry brushes are placed where they will stand up fairly straight, pour the solution into the side (mine were jam-packed so, it took a little precision) until it covers the majority of the hairs but doesn’t go up into the ferule. Allow to sit for a minute, swish (if the brushes are tightly packed, pick up the glass and swish it). Allow to sit for a couple more minutes and then DRAIN down the sink. Well, hang on. Maybe before you waste the solution, do as I did: pick up an offensive brush and sniff. You should mostly smell the laundry additive but if you can still smell stench? Back it goes for one minute and a good swishing. You may even choose to remove the brushes are now non-smelly. I did. However, after that added time, I did NOT want to damage my brushes (the glue inside the ferule will get some solution based upon the hairs soft of sucking it up in there) so, I poured out and then…

Wash as per normal deep clean. I use either a Sephora knockoff or BeautyBlender brand soap. Either are fine but I like those two. After squeezing out the rinse water, sniff. Mine were all ready to go but for the most densely-packed, flat-topped face brush. That lil betch got a full-on second go. I still have leftover solution after 3 glasses worth.

Live Long and Prosper.

(This was uploaded last Tuesday but I guess I was too squirrelly to notice it saved as a draft)