IRL, this is what you get

Dunno if I’d had one bottle of wine at this point or was well into another…couple. I’m bestowing advice (or proclaiming love…or telling a dirty joke) to my “daughter” at her bridal shower. Oh, there are two and I can imagine it’s the latter from the second pic.

Madtante and child

Madtante and child

Madtante and child 2

Madtante and child 2

It’s like Madonna and Child but not so much.

pre-bday imbibing and baking

Baking my own gf bday cake, of course.

I haven’t made one of these cakes -the normal version in about 20 years! Used to be a Xmas staple.

I haz invented a cocktail!

It looks very bday-ish and tastes just as sweet. I’m thinking this ain’t one to get hammered on…

Lily’s 44th Birthday Cake Cocktail

2 oz Triple Sec

2 oz Vodka 

3 oz Pineapple Juice

4 maraschino cherries

1 t maraschino cherry juice (or grenadine)

10 oz ‘Tropical’ soda (think Fresca or Squirt)

I typically prefer bitter but this is quite fun!

‘I am a Scientist’ – you dirty, drunken hippie

Anybody around me long enough will hear the self-proclamation of being a scientist but it’s usually meant when I come up with some bullshit that ought to be true but sometimes it’s because I try something and am reporting my findings.

Let’s be clear: that’s not what a scientist does, try something and report their opinion as fact.

It’s why it’s funny when I claim to be a scientist. It’s theHilarity!


You may have heard of dirty chai (chai with a shot of espresso) and you may have heard it called different things, one of which I’ve heard is a Dirty Hippie. That was particularly funny as it was from an art house-coffeehouse where I got it.

As I’m baking, I needed to drink alcohol –like Incredible People of the 70s-80s, ‘don’t try this at home’ and I’d already made a dirty chai.

Enter The Whiskey.

Lily’s A Dirty Drunken Hippie

2 oz Jameson

1 shot espresso 

1 C chai (I used tea bags and heated ~2 oz unsweetened soya


Don’t let me know if you don’t like it.

Smokin’ Catnip / Serious Alcoholic

50- something Dude: Ever try catnip?

Me: [arches eyebrow] I know what you’re saying. That shite don’t work.

50: No! It’s true! You smoke it and–

Me: Yeah. I have smoked it and hash-brownied it. No effect.

50: Really? Of all the ‘others,’ it worked for me; you know dried banana peels, nutmeg, oregano–

Me: Stinks up the house worse than reefer. Na, man. I’m a Serious Alcoholic–

50: Takes something with more ‘pow?’

Me: Reckon.

-you realise, it’s just mint?


St. Patrick’s Day 2015 Summary

The Duchess: How was The Parade?

Me: I got into an argument with a cop who has a problem with middle-aged women…who cross police barricades.

Dutch: Stop calling yourself ‘middle-aged.’

Spike: How was The Parade?

Me: I got drunk and slept through most of it.

Spike: Slept!?!

Me: I mixed my drinks early. Wasn’t planned. Could’ve done worse.

Spike: Right.

-let me just say, dressing up somebody who’s taking a nap during a parade’s not cool…though it is funny

It’s like a room temp toddy… Amaretto Sour

I don’t often go for sweet drinks but I’ve had a good score of these in my life.

Feeling festive, I picked up a bottle of Disarronno last week. I have a nagging cough this week, so I made this. Well, this is what’s left:


I didn’t feel like making simple syrup, though it REALLY is simple. I just wanted some lemony booze for this throat soreness:

1t fine sugar
1oz lemon juice
2oz Disarronno

Shake it like a Polaroid picture.


this makes me happy

I saw this whilst looking for stuff to delete from my Dropbox. It’s Yours Truly dancing with a homeless dude. We’re freestyling it there but we also jitterbugged quite a bit. Afterward, the lead singer came up and thanked me for being Awesome.

I’m your biggest fan, whoever the hell you are, dudes playing music when I’m drunk!

Cutting a rug, yo

Cutting a rug, yo